I’m a Victim of Murphy and Finagle

This has been a week of “if it can, it will” with a dash of “at the worst possible time.” It seems that someone has been increasing the entropy in my vicinity.

On top of my weird sleeping issues and Fitzy being sick, my car decided to freak out yesterday. Bruce, named for Campbell and McCulloch, has been having battery issues for the entire time that I’ve had her. (Yes, she’s a girl named Bruce. What of it?) The connection ‘trodes on the battery have always been loose, which sometimes meant I had to wiggle them to get the car to start. (We learned this after I had to get a friend to jump the battery at around 1am in January when I was leaving a party at Strangeland Records godrestit.) Last spring my battery decided to die. It had been 6 years since it was put in my car and I knew it needed to be replaced but since I had just been laid off I wasn’t really focused on spending money. AAA came and sold me a new one and told me to get my ‘trodes looked at, so I brought the car to my mechanic, Mark, and then went to Colorado because my nephew was preparing to be born. When I came back, all was well. Or so I thought.

I’ve had to have Bruce jumped two or three times since then. Once was definitely my fault-I wasn’t thinking and left the lights on. But I have no clue about the other times. We have stacked parking at work, which means leaving your keys in the car and letting parking attendants move them around, and normally they call if the car is misbehaving: the alarm won’t shut up or they need to do a jump or whatever. I guess since it is recess they have fewer attendants, or something, because they just didn’t move my car (at 5:30 or so they start arranging the vehicles so you don’t need to get other cars around you moved in order to leave, and keep the keys locked up until you come get them). I have a Porta-jump, but hadn’t charged it since last spring, so while it had enough power to make my alarm wail and my clock flicker dimly, I couldn’t start Bruce up. Fortunately, at that very moment, a staffer stopped and asked if I needed a hand, and since I carry jumper cables everywhere (thanks to my parents, who want me to be prepared for all eventualities, and also to be as self sufficient as possible) he was happy to bring his car around to give me a jump, and chat with me while we waited for the battery to charge a bit before disconnecting the cables. (I wasn’t paying attention to the clamps and made some sparks, too, which was startling. Note to self: pay attention when dealing with electricity, moron.) I thanked him like 50 times (and sent an email to let him know Bruce didn’t die on the way home or anything and say thank you AGAIN) and went on my way and happily, Bruce seems fine. I just have no idea what drained her! I’m taking her to see Mark sometime next week so he can look at the entire electrical system (and maybe fix the connection for the lights near the gear shift, which only go on if I smack the panel really hard, and identify what it is that’s making the noise in my dash when I turn–thought it was a coin in a compartment, but there’s no change in there, turns out)

Despite all the complications of this week, I’m in a pretty good mood (sleeping all night probably contributed significantly to that.) Spent some time with The Boy last night, which also helped good mooditude, because I (shockingly!) enjoy spending time with him. He got a message on the dating site through which we met last night sounding him out for a polyamorous relationship, which is funnier when you know the person saw he was seeing someone and wanted to see if he might be interested in being a third in her relationship rather than trying to see if she could be a third in ours. (This also led to a discussion about how we feel about poly relationships, which boiled down to “they’re fine for people who want them, but things are pretty good as they are, for us.”) The way people’s brains work is weird, you guys. Of course, I can’t blame her, since he is adorbz and silly, but still, that had to take some balls. “Hi, your profile made me laugh, please leave your girlfriend and date me and my partner.” Balls of steel, y’all.




Filed under derby, life in general, personal shit

2 responses to “I’m a Victim of Murphy and Finagle

  1. I’m really nervous giving people jumps. Because of the electricity thing. And the moron-clumsyface thing. I feel like I’m begging God to shoot her lightbolts at me through a car battery. So far she’s been kind, but one of these days I’ll be kindly hooking up my Enterprise Shuttlecraft of a Prius to someone’s battery, thinking about how much more awesome a jump from a Prius is than from other cars, and the next thing I know I’ll be losing control of my bowels and needing immediate defibrillation.

    • Aside from the fact that I’ve done it so often I have it memorized, my cables include instructions attached to ’em. Between me and the dude who helped, I was the one who knew how to keep us from being fried. (connect dead to live, neg neg then pos pos–he hooked the clamps to both his electrodes first and I was like “uhm…no”)

      On the bright side, if you need to be defibbed, the car battery is RIGHT THERE :p

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