Okay so yesterday I was all “MUST FOCUS ON GOOD THINGS BECAUSE EVERYTHING EVER SUCKS” and lots of stuff really does suck. My insurance card is essentially useless, because I have to change every single doctor ever in order to get any sort of medical coverage; my meds aren’t covered, and I can’t get them covered. I can’t use pharmaceutical patient assistance programs because I have prescription coverage, even if it doesn’t cover that prescription. (Trust me, I checked–I can use PAPs for other meds, just not for this one.) And the previous shit goes unresolved.
However! My brain is relearning to balance without training wheels. The stupid frustrating little things are not causing me to burst into tears, nor am I raging quite as much when they happen. I’m more able to be excited for the other freshies about try-outs (this Saturday OMG) rather than envious and isolated. I’m not screaming “I HATE YOU” at the cats anymore when they do cat things. Plus? HOW FUCKING CUTE AM I?
Photo by James Calder, 2012. “Love” written on my arm in eyeliner by friend and fellow freshie, C.